44 (November: Me Day)

Happy birthday to me! (Well, on Monday.)

Here’s this month’s progress pic (just woke up, and it shows):


Made in 1971: Some original parts


October vs November


Definitely smaller in my waist and back. (Thanks Piyo!) But it’s interesting how fat loss doesn’t happen at the same rate on both sides. Check out how there’s more behind my right arm than my left, for example. Part of that is a bad bra but I really have found that uneven distribution thing to be true. (Seriously, though, I couldn’t have brushed my hair first?)

Here’s the rest of 2015:
No weigh-in, I’m away from my scale until December. May eventually brave Mac’s, but I’m really trying to concentrate more on how I feel and how my clothes fit for awhile. I know I’m smaller than I was last month, people have told me and also I can wear things I couldn’t before. I wore a pair of size 8 pants last week! They had spandex in them, but still! And I’m in my size 10 skinny jeans. My skinny pair is always a size bigger than my bootcut pair, so it makes sense that I’m into the skinny 10s just as I’m preparing to go into the 8 bootcuts.

Been a good birthday. First, I had a wonderful visit with my Om and her new husband. He had a conference in town, so she came with and we hung out during the days, shopping, dining, exploring the city. Had a great meal at a local Brazilian spot–best grilled shrimp I’ve ever had. I tend to overcook it, so it’s always a treat to have it properly prepared.

Another highlight: She got me an orange birthday teakettle (I love tea!) and also helped me to choose dishes and cookware. Finally, after nearly two years! I’ve been comically lazy about it. My paper plates and plastic cutlery had become the stuff of legend, especially since I’d clearly put much thought and effort into the rest of the house. I couldn’t find anything I liked. Now I’ll actually have to start cooking real meals, huh? Maybe learn to properly grill shrimp?

They left Sunday and yesterday, I flew out to Oklahoma, my second home, for a combo birthday/Thanksgiving celebration. Got a funny Piyo tanktop and a giftcard to complete my dishware set (hmmm it’s almost as if people want to strike while the iron is hot…). And these treats were waiting for me. (Cake cake cake…and it really was my birthday.) Not pictured: the salted caramel one I devoured. Gluten free that’s actually good? It’s a Birthgiving miracle!
We are registered for a Turkey Trot 5K Thursday morning but that’s not gonna happen. I just don’t have the energy; healthwise it’s a bit of a bumpier road right now. I’ve been so worn out.

Forced myself to go to the doctor yesterday morning; been dragging my feet because I didn’t want to take prednisone and I was afraid that these symptoms were related to my recent bout of pleurisy. But I realized the other day that this is a familiar feeling–iron anemia. Turns out I was right. Tests show that both my iron AND potassium are low, actually. So, yay? No prednisone. But the iron is going to jack up my already jacked up GI system. Pfffft.

BTW, here’s the t-shirt I was planning to wear to the 5K. I’ll wear it to lounge around the house on Thanksgiving. That’s almost like doing a 5K, right? I don’t remember if I made one of those handprint turkeys back in the day, but I’d like to believe mine would’ve looked like this if I did:
Ah well, things will settle down eventually. They always do.  And then I can get on track with my birthday health resolution: I’m committed to reaching peak fitness this year, really getting in shape. I’m less than 30 lbs from goal (185) and want to see what Piyo and Xtrain can make of this 44-year-old body. Additionally, I’m determined to work more vegetables into my meals.



Do you remember the first GPS devices? The computer lady’s voice seemed to grow increasingly more irritated when she had to replot the course because you’d ignored the instructions she’d (very clearly) given you (ya dumbass).


Know what I realized today? I’ve been doing the same thing with my body–missing the directions it’s giving me, maybe because I haven’t been paying attention or perhaps because I thought I knew better.

I don’t want to be 165 lbs anymore. Recalculating…

Nothing’s happened. I haven’t lost my motivation or my faith in my ability to reach that goal. I just have begun to realize that I’m not really that far from being pretty damn happy with my body. Certainly not nearly 50 lbs away.

Lately, I’m feeling pretty sassy about my reflection. Don’t know if it’s Piyo (which, lemmetellu, is so freaking amazing that I look forward to doing it. I can already fell a major difference in my level of joint pain and flexibility. Love. It.). Don’t know if my brain just finally caught up with my eyes. Don’t know. But I like it!

Also, I’m feeling more comfortable in my clothes. Last night, I ran home from work to do a quick change for an evening event. I threw on some “leather” culottes and a turtleneck sweater and off I went. Later, at the table, while giggling with friends over our auction shenanigans, it suddenly hit me that I was sitting there in a size M top and size M pants. Not only that, but I’d thrown them on without a second thought of how they’d look. Not only that, but they were the “it’s been a long week and I just wanna be comfortable tonight” option.

As I drove home, I revisited that earlier experience and asked myself where this was going. Where did I think I could be happy and comfortable in my skin? The answer is: in size 6 jeans. And with my body type, it won’t take getting to 165 lbs to make that happen. So why do it?

I want to fit comfortably into the size 6s on the jeans ladder. No overhang on the waist. Fully capable of breathing and other activities while wearing them. When I get there, I’m done.

Pretty sure I’m heading for a toned 185ish.


The best day of the year! (October: Treat Yo Self)

Happy Halloween! No tricks, just treats. Going to do something nice for myself today. Why? Because it’s Treat yo self 2015!

Treat yo self--front

211 lbs today. Still plugging along towards goal. Even though the scale losses aren’t big, I definitely see and feel a difference in my body each month. I wore a pair of leggings to work Thursday (Monday-Wednesday wore me out so badly that the only way I could convince myself to get out of bed and into the office was to promise that I didn’t have to wear real pants) and could tell that I’ve made considerable progress in my abdominal region. Yeah!

For comparison, here is the 2012 Treat Yo Self picture, back when I was doing Optifast. Looks a little different, yeah? (Note: Accidentally wrote 2013 on the pic, and am too lazy to go back and correct it.)

Treat Yo Self 2013

Here are the updated 2015 collages (front, back, and side):

Front collage--updated October

Back collage--updated October

Side collage--updated October

The best friend and I are starting Piyo tomorrow–we’re in different states, but will keep the same schedule and check in with each other daily. We both took before pics today and are really looking forward to seeing our progress at the end of 60 days. I’m also interested in seeing how differently it feels from the last time I tried it; I’ve lost a lot of weight and inches since then and am in much better shape. Perhaps those bird-named poses (the pigeon, the crow) won’t Tippi Hedren me this time? One can hope!


Ain’t nuthin but a G-cup thang, baby!


So, I’ve suspected for a few months that my chestal region wasn’t really budging, even as I’m shrinking. My PCP even joked about how I was that girl–somehow managing to avoid taking a weight loss hit to the boobs. Some of us are just “lucky” that way. She understands; both she and her sister had reductions too and her sister’s grew back!

Day of surgery, I was in a very comfortable, well-fitting 42DD. The most recent good fit was a 40D. When that band got too loose, though, I tried to do a 38DD. No. 38D. No. I kept falling out underneath and, again, assumed it was from a too loose band. A Google search revealed that it was actually caused by a too small cup.

I realized that I had no clue what size to buy, so I went to the store on a mission to try every cup combo in 36 and 38 until it fit perfectly. I did and it did. Which it? A 36G!

At first, it kinda freaked me out to be buying a G-cup after having a reduction. That surgery left me a D; I started in a too small J. (Holy.) But 1) the surgeon told me that I was genetically predisposed and might rebound and 2) this Wacoal bra is my new best friend. (Condolences, Mack.) I want to sing like a canary and dance like a gazelle in it! *twirls* Ahhhhh comfort and support. Who knew?

O. M. G.


1st surgiversary 5K: Friday the 13th on Saturday the 24th

Been a good week! Wednesday was a year since my gastric sleeve. Friday was my 1-year follow-up appointment with the surgeon (he was quite pleased!). And today, some friends joined me in a 5K to cap off a year of making major strides in my health.

Most of us walked most of it. I initially had aspirations of running but lack of training combined with a bout of pleurisy meant I wasn’t even. Still, it was so much fun just hanging out and doing something physical with several of the people who supported and inspired me this past year.

Since it’s Halloween season, there were lots of costumes. I went as a Camp Crystal Lake counselor and we joked that I needed to find a Jason. (There’s always a Jason, right?) Well he found me! I heard laughter and looked up and he was going full Voorhees nearby. It was great! So I went over and we took a pic:


It’s been a really good year and I’m looking forward to next year, and moving closer to my goal of peak fitness. What can my body do? I want to find out!


Five hundred twenty-five thousand, six hundred minutes

It’s my surgiversary!! Whoa, that year flew by!

How do you measure a year?

In pounds?
Highest weight: 330 lbs
Surgery (10/21/14): 305 lbs
1-year (10/21/15): 211.8 lbs
Post-op loss: 93.2 lbs (118.2 total)
Average post-op weekly loss: 1.79 lbs
Average post-op monthly loss: 7.77 lbs (lucky!)
Lbs to goal: 46.8

Highest: 46.0
Surgery day: 42.5
1-year: 29.5

Overjoyed to be overweight! (I’ll take “Things you never thought you’d say” for $300, Alex.) I’ll hit “normal” at 178.5 lbs. At my highest and on the day of surgery, I was Obesity Class III! Extremely high risk. The highest obesity category. (Always was an overachiever!) I’m 70% of the way towards my final goal.

In sizes?
4+ sizes. I “wore” a so-tight-I-used-a-ponytail-holder-as-a-buttonhole-extender size 18 last year and my getting-baggy-in-the-butt everyday jeans are now a size 10. I’m so close to being able to button the 8s. Wearing them in public is still a good 10 lbs away, but I’m headed in the right direction.

In photos?
Paper is the traditional 1st anniversary gift, so my t-shirt features a fitness paper doll. Enlarge the pic for detail–I think it’s really cool!


I’m 305 in the day of surgery pic and 330 (highest) in the blue shirt.



This is my jeans ladder. The 10s are at the bottom. Yes those are maternity jeans above the 18s. No I wasn’t pregnant. Wow.


How about love?
The love in my life has increased so much over this past year. I feel so much better and I’ve turned that both outward and inward. Love for myself, not because my jeans are smaller but because I’ve become much more intentional about nurturing my own well-being. I’ve long been the kind of person who would gladly do anything for the people I care about. Only now, I finally count myself in that number. I buy myself flowers, make healthier food choices, commit to moving my body regularly, etc. and am finding real joy in that. Having more energy makes it easy to have more optimism too, and I think that makes me a better person to be around. Everybody wins; it’s scientifically proven that a person’s overall well-being increases when they have relationships with people who are happy!

I really wanted to get to 205 by today, -100 from my surgery date and -125 total, and I was getting a little bummed out at first, once it became certain that I was not going to make it. But that’s another place that self-love comes in handy. I get that I’ve done a damn good job over this past year. I’m healthier and happier than ever and that’s worth so much!

I need to remember that not too long ago, getting out of the 300s seemed so hard to imagine. 205 (and 195, and 185, and 175, and 165) is coming, I know that to be true. Right now, I’m going to savor the hell out of 211.8.

One year down, a lifetime to go!


Hair, there and everywhere

Sleevie faked me out! From what I’ve read, most people experience major hair loss around the 4-month mark. Since I really didn’t register a lot of fallout at that point, I thought I’d somehow managed to escape that side effect. Nope! My hair loss picked up about a month ago and is now going full force. Sucks. It’s difficult to know if the loss is due to weight loss or Stew. Ultimately, though, it doesn’t really matter. I’m just taking my vitamins daily and hoping it runs its course sooner rather than later.

Wow, I can’t believe the 21st is my 1-year surgiversary! I’m making an all-out effort to get as close to 205/-100 lbs post-op as I can. I keep saying that I don’t want to care so much for the scale number but I really still do and I want to wring as much out of the honeymoon period as possible.

Whatever the 21st brings, you couldn’t pay me to weigh at the moment. Lovely trip to San Antonio for my nephew’s Air Force graduation last weekend. But two flights and an 8-hour roadtrip, a lurking Tide, and wheat-cheating has me so bloated and out of sorts. I feel like a water balloon!